You know what I don't get?
by Lucky2013
Summary: A hilarious one-shot! As a young child, Mikey raises some questions for his brothers; talk about awkward. What could his curious mind have wondered to now? You will just have to read on to find out... Contains only one swear word. Set in the 2012 universe.


**Hey there!**

**Just a quick note:**

**I am currently writing a main story called: 'Not all monsters lurk in the dark.' Please feel free to give it a read and also don't forget to leave a review; all opinions are welcome! I would very much appreciate it as it helps me with improving my story and help me become a better writer.**

**Anyway, I had a break as I came to a writers block (annoying, right?) for my main story so I decided to write this one shot just for fun. I hope you have as much fun reading it as I did writing it. Enjoy...**

"You know what I don't get?" Michelangelo, no older than eleven, randomly outbursted in a very high pitched voice. Wide with wonder, his bright blue eyes were glued to the TV screen; he cocked his head from where he sat on the floor, just inches away. A couple of sighs and a groan (from a certain hot-head) sounded from the young turtle's older siblings.

"What is it _now?_" His voice also a high pitch, Donatello questioned with annoyance.

The latter, Leonardo and Raphael were sat on the couch in the pit.

Spinning himself around, Michelangelo quickly re-crossed his legs."During movies when two people are kissing," His voice was so adorable; he began, staring down at the floor. A hint of blush stroked his cheeks due to embarrassment; his baby blue eyes wandered towards his side.

Anticipating, his brothers stared at him.

"Well...erm..." He mumbled.

"What? What is it!?" Raphael snapped.

Leonardo frowned at his impatient brother. As his blue gaze glided back to his youngest brother, he softened; Michelangelo stared up at them, eyes wide with wonder and a smile as bright as day. He was so adorable; the freckles on his cheeks gave him a very innocent look which he would cleverly yet mischievously use to his advantage at times.

Leonardo smiled warmly at him. "Go on Mikey, tell us what you don't get." He gently encouraged.

Michelangelo smiled up at his big brother, taking a deep breath, he opened his mouth as widely as possible, "Why does it go blank when they are kissing in a bedroom and then show them lying in bed together?" He spoke in a rush. Then paused, thinking things over. "Do they like, wrestle on the bed or something?" His eye-ridges knitted together in thought as his baby blue eyes roved over the floor. He glanced back up at them, "But then, cuddle afterwards?" He stared up at his brothers, waiting, for a moment as silence lingered.

Completely bewildered, Leonardo gaped at his little brother. He exchanged glances with Donatello who's cheeks were highlighted with pink then with Raphael who had the biggest smirk plastered on his face. Simultaneously, they glanced back at their youngest brother; each with their own facial expressions.

Donatello cleared his throat during the awkward silence. Shifting his gaze quickly, he sideways glanced at Leonardo, coughing louder and more obvious.

The latter frowned in misunderstanding, shaking his head.

Roving his chocolate brown eyes to Michelangelo, Don signalled Leo to be the one to tell him.

"Mikey," Leonardo gently began as said turtle glanced his way, "Didn't," He rubbed the back of his neck, feeling rather awkward. "Master Splinter have the _talk_ with you?"

"Say wha?" Total confusion plastered on the young turtle's face.

"You know that _talk _we had with Master Splinter just last year?" Donatello helped his older brother out.

Cocking his head at his purple-clad brother, confusion still remained with Michelangelo.

Donatello face palmed, sighing outwardly. "The. Talk." He mono toned, adding air quotes.

"Ooooooh," Michelangelo nodded his head slowly.

"You don't know what I'm talking about do ya?"

"Nope."

"For the love of-" Raphael's raucous voice bellowed."Remember when Splinter took us all aside on our own and gave us The. Talk?" Following his nerdy brother's previous antics, he added air quotes. "It was embarrassing." He cringed and shivered at the memory.

"Ooh _that_ talk." Michelangelo pitched as he finally realized what the heck his older brothers were talking about. "Oh," His voice lowered as his eye ridges knitted together in bemusement. "So that means...they were..."

"_Yeah..._" Leonardo's voice thickened.

"Pretty much." Raphael dead panned yet feeling quite triumph as he was the only one to get through to their naive little brother.

Michelangelo smirked to himself. "Heh. So they were..." His immaturity kicked in as he sniggered. "Getting it on..."

Raphael rolled his eyes. "Yeah, bone head." Picking up a used tattered comic, his face quickly disappeared behind it.

The adverts continued sounding from the TV, filling the brief silence lingering through the lair:

_'Here at Walmart, we've lowered our prices. Buy one detergent and get one completely free! You can now-'_

"Do you guys..." Michelangelo trailed off his sentence, glancing at the floor, he tried his best to paste his words together. He glanced up in between his brothers, "Think that we might get to do _that _one day?" He glanced from brother to brother. "With girls." He added, not that he needed to as they got the gist of what he meant.

Donatello's face became scarlet as he lowered his head further into his shell. Leonardo stared at the floor; he swung his feet as they dangled above the ground (his legs, at the time, too short to reach), for once, he was lost for words.

Raphael didn't move from his position; his face still hidden behind the superman comic.

"Maybe." Leonardo quietly answered. His head lifted, realizing what he said, he frantically glanced from brother to brother, "I mean, yuk!" Ducking his head, the blue-clad turtle was fooling no one; he has always been a bad liar.

"Yeah." Michelangelo sighed."Raph?" He asked, lifting his head, he met with the comic placed in the hot-head's grasp.

There was a brief moment of silence.

"Raphie?"

Defeated, Raphael let out a sigh from behind his comic. He tossed it aside. "Listen, Mikey. That's less likely to happen to us. I mean, look at us! We're..._freaks_." He grimaced at the harsh word. "What girl would consider that?"

"Nuh-ah." Michelangelo protested. Always the optimists. "I heard that girls go for different guys." He grinned.

"Where have you heard _that?_"

"TV!" With glee, Michelangelo threw his arms in the air like a two year old.

"True." Leonardo nodded with a small smirk. He glanced beside him at Raphael, "He has you there Raph." The latter rolled his emerald eyes.

"Yeah _different _as in different_ types _of guys." Raphael pointed out, stubbornly sticking to his point.

Michelangelo stuck out his tongue at his stubborn brother. Raphael made a swing for him; Michelangelo dodged, laughing playfully.

The movie the turtles were previously watching, sounded up again:

'_Derek.'_ A disembodied female voice gasped. _'Are you alright?_'

_'Yes, my love.'_ A masculine voice answered. _'Don't worry, I shall protect you. Even if *cough* I'm at my last breath.' The screen illuminated with a handsome man and a blonde woman's face. Leaning in, the couple began passionately kissing._

Making a gagging noise, Michelangelo prodded his broad finger to the back of his throat, mimicking him being sick.

"This film is getting _way_ too corny." Raphael groaned, rolling his emerald eyes.

"A minuet ago, you were curious about this stuff," Donatello raised an eye-ridge at his orange masked brother.

"Yeah but those two are taking it WAY too far. They look like they're gunna swallow each other. Eww." Michelangelo cringed at the scene playing on the TV. Then, deep breathing sounded from the film; Michelangelo's eyes widened.

_The couple continued passionately kissing while taking each others clothes off. _Michelangelo, however, didn't bother shifting his gaze as he drifted into a trance.

"Okay, enough of that." Pressing the remote, Leonardo changed the channel; a car chase screeched from the TV, instantly gaining Raphael's interest. He didn't want his younger brother traumatise despite his unmoving gaze.

"Hey!" Michelangelo whined. "I was watching that."

"We've talked enough about S. E. X." Raphael scolded without turning his head away from the screen; he was on the edged of his seat, closer towards the TV.

Michelangelo mouthed the letters Raphael spelled out. Witnessing this, Donatello and Leonardo rolled their eyes.

After figuring out what it spelled, Michelangelo's eyes almost popped out of his head in a cartoonist way, "SEX!" He blurted out before quickly covering his mouth with both hands.

"What was that my son?" A familiar deep voice sounded from behind the couch; the four brothers simultaneously jumped; Michelangelo yelped.

A tall rat loomed behind them, his facial expression was motionless; unreadable."Master Splinter!" Michelangelo shrieked. "I um..." Rubbing the back of his head, he glanced at his brothers for help.

"He meant that..." Donatello pitched in, showing his adorable gapped toothed grin, he smiled weakly. Panicking, he looked to Raphael.

"Two people..." Raphael followed, gesturing with his hands, he chagrinned. He turned to Leonardo.

"Had..._a baby?_" Leonardo's voice pitched up in question. Raphael face palmed due to his brother's excuse, sounding a **smack** as his palm made contact with his face.

"Is that so?" Questioned the elderly rat, raising his white brows at his sons.

Sheepishly, they simultaneously nodded.

"And where would you have heard such things?" The rat further Questioned.

"The news?" Michelangelo raised his shoulders, cringing at his own answer.

"Aah the news." There was a hint of sarcasm in the rat's voice. Turning around, a smile played at his lips. He then began making his way towards the kitchen; his wooden cane 'clicked' as it made contact with the floor. They each anticipated for him to be gone. Soon, the tapping faded into silence as the tall rat disappeared.

The coast was clear.

"Phew! That was too close." Michelangelo sighed, falling back into Raphael's lap. The latter glared at him. The immature turtle smiled back up at his brother. "Aww." The foolish turtle taunted, poking Raphael in the face. At first, the latter was motionless. With his brother's further taunting, Raph's eye twitched due to the fury burning inside him. As Michelangelo slowly brought his broad green finger towards Raphael's face for the fourth time, Raph snapped and took ahold of it. Snapping it backwards, a series of "ows" escaped from Michelangelo as his brother bent it back further. Effortlessly, the hot-head flipped him out of his lap by his finger, causing a thud to sound as his brother collided with the floor.

Shooting straight back up, the hyper turtle shook his behind at Raphael, "Ner Ner!" He laughed, infuriating him further. He giggled.

"Fuck sake, _Mikey!_"

"OOOH! That was a swear! I'm telling Splinter!" The sounds of the latter's cane clicked from behind the turtles; Mikey turned his head, "Here he comes now." He grinned at Raphael. Clutching his stomach, he began another round of a laughing fit.

Raphael grinned maliciously. "Yeah, here he comes. Hey, Master Splinter!" He called out, not bothering to turn his head. The cane-clicking stopped. "I think _Mikey_ needs The. Talk. Again."

Holding his stomach, Michelangelo Continued his laughing fit when suddenly, he was grabbed underneath the side of his jaw by a paw. "Ah!" He yelped.

Splinter dragged off with a squirming Michelangelo who cringed at the thought of having The. Talk again.

Smirking to himself, Raphael re-opened his comic. Behind him, Michelangelo's whining voice became fainter by the second: "RAPH! Raph! Ow, Ow...well played dude...Well played..."

**Well... Good? Bad? Please, quickly leave a review. Also if you really enjoyed it, I suggest you read my other story. Thanks :)**


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